A secular site promoting use of evidence-based prevention methods to reduce cult victimization
Thursday, January 26, 2012
Saturday, January 21, 2012
Galactic Federation of Light--let the 2012 madness begin!! I mean continue
This group is reportedly preparing for alien invasion on January 23, 2012 and recommending stockpiling of food and supplies. I've heard this word-of-mouth but can't stomach sorting through the verbal overproductivity on the site to find if they've said this in writing.
On their Q&A page (linked above), they say a few key things. I'll paraphrase them here to save you some time.
1. We are sending you updates on the Internet and in our books that cause your DNA to vibrate in a certain way. This is not to be confused with other vibrators you get through the mail.
2. Angels, god(s)(ess)(es) are involved with aliens, but in a good way. Sorta.
3. Supernova, stars, blah blah space stuff, there's a hole in the universe that will enable contact with aliens soon. In fact this has been known by many ancient religions. There is even an old hymn based on this knowledge, "There's a hole in space, dear Liza, dear Liza..." Oh, wait. That's not it.
4. The Council of Nine is something important...blah, blah, word salad, blah blah blah.
5. Your belief in this nonsense is helping the planet somehow, and is also changing your own DNA to make you grow fast, like a toddler. The growth is why you're tired, not the strain of attempting to understand nonsensical drivel.
666. Are there opposers? Of course there are! We couldn't exist without them. Opposition brings cult members together. We call our opposers "dark forces". Similar to the demons in the bible, it's convenient since Christians and other demon-believers won't have to learn and accept yet another brand new belief.
7. We will give you instructions about forming Welcome Wagon committees to welcome the aliens with love, brotherhood and useful coupons for local restaurants. Do not form these committees until we instruct you, or we won't get our Welcome Wagon commission.
8. Human race's measurement of time: You're doing it wrong. New members won't be able to comprehend it until they use their vibrators. See #1.
9. Remember, kids--you need us to survive!!1! Oh snap.
On their Q&A page (linked above), they say a few key things. I'll paraphrase them here to save you some time.
1. We are sending you updates on the Internet and in our books that cause your DNA to vibrate in a certain way. This is not to be confused with other vibrators you get through the mail.
2. Angels, god(s)(ess)(es) are involved with aliens, but in a good way. Sorta.
3. Supernova, stars, blah blah space stuff, there's a hole in the universe that will enable contact with aliens soon. In fact this has been known by many ancient religions. There is even an old hymn based on this knowledge, "There's a hole in space, dear Liza, dear Liza..." Oh, wait. That's not it.
4. The Council of Nine is something important...blah, blah, word salad, blah blah blah.
5. Your belief in this nonsense is helping the planet somehow, and is also changing your own DNA to make you grow fast, like a toddler. The growth is why you're tired, not the strain of attempting to understand nonsensical drivel.
666. Are there opposers? Of course there are! We couldn't exist without them. Opposition brings cult members together. We call our opposers "dark forces". Similar to the demons in the bible, it's convenient since Christians and other demon-believers won't have to learn and accept yet another brand new belief.
7. We will give you instructions about forming Welcome Wagon committees to welcome the aliens with love, brotherhood and useful coupons for local restaurants. Do not form these committees until we instruct you, or we won't get our Welcome Wagon commission.
8. Human race's measurement of time: You're doing it wrong. New members won't be able to comprehend it until they use their vibrators. See #1.
9. Remember, kids--you need us to survive!!1! Oh snap.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)